While I was catching up on the latest episode of New Girl which stars one of my brides-to-be Miss.Zooey Deschanel, she made a Hitler joke that didn’t go down well and I completely related to her. As my friends well know, I tend to make
inappropriate Hitler jokes every chance I get. He’s just so easy to take the piss out of and doesn’t he deserve to be made fun of? Well maybe not when you’re in a crowded hall of probably, mostly, Jewish people at a Janis Ian gig. ‘You’d get on well with Hitler’, I exclaimed at my highly embarrassed friend, as she facepalmed herself and tried to pretend she didn’t know me.
I use Hitler for everything. I compare things to Hitler, if I’m wearing black nail polish I put my finger under my nose to make me look Hitler, I wonder aloud about Hitler when people really don’t give a fuck. I think I may be a little obsessed with Adolf. I just can’t seem to get my head around how popular he was among his own people and how everyone else didn’t just go ‘wait a minute, this guy is a douchebag.’ I guess everyone just underestimated him due to his size and lack of a ball. ‘There’s no way he’s a threat. He can’t even procreate.’ But that didn’t matter cause he was obviously anti-create.
You’ll find me watching crap like ‘Hitler’s Henchmen’ or ‘Hitler’s Lost Gold’ or ‘Hitler’s Reaction To…’ videos. Personally I think everyone should use Hitler as a punchline since we can’t use him as a punching bag. I also refer to ‘Mein Kampf’ a lot. I’ve never read it but I just tend to say ‘Mein Kampf’ a lot, in an angry German accent.
Another thing I like to ask people is ‘Why hasn’t anyone made a film from Hitler’s point of view?’, then the look of pure horror and confusion washes over the face of whoever I just posed the question to. I don’t mean a point of view as in ‘Oh,poor Hitler being misunderstood,’ I mean let’s do a film from his point of view and show how much of a dick and a whimp he was, and how in the end he proved that and good eventually won over evil. I think I should pitch this to Lars Von Trier, he’d be all over it.
In conclusion, I don’t like Hitler in any way but I do enjoy using him for jokes, sarcasm, insults, film ideas and for my own general entertainment. And so I leave you with a clip from Father Ted that pretty much sums me up. I’m Father Ted and the Chinese are everybody else.